Ok….so im done running from the topic..it took some time..but a billion tears later I think I am finally ready to actually talk about the stages and my experience with my breakup. I think it is hard for me to be transparent and open about such a sensitive topic and to be honest I don’t know if I will really reveal all of the details BUT after a lot of pushing and shoving and encouraging from friends and viewers….i think I can get through it. These posts kinda can go along with our new Girltalk:Diary of a Bisonette the break up series which is now posted on our youtube page @ www.youtube.com/girltalkforever. (check out my amazing acting skills lol!)
The way I am probably gonna do this is in various blogs that way it wont be super long. But all concerns aside my sweaty nervous fingers..and rapidly beating heart are here to share a story..a love journey..and offer guidance….sooo if you’re ready..cuz I’m really not lol..here we go!
Stage 1: walking alone
So I dated Mr…uh …we will call him “x” for a while…. He was an amazing boyfriend but even better best friend… we had our ups and downs like every relationship and were churning out 3 years…and counting before the big split. I have had boyfriends in the past but X was different..I think it is safe to say that he was my first real adult boyfriend..meaning he took me on dates..did the romancing…wine…dine..all that jazz and it was amazing! The entire ride was filled with love and that makes me happy looking back on knowing that our relationship was good.
Why did it end? Well to be honest…I really don’t know… there were plenty of reasons…future plans …and focusing on spiritual growth God…and we were bumping heads a lot towards the end of the relationship..but whatever reason it maybe it ended. It was me that started the convo..u know that one about ‘hey lets not be together anymore’ and a lot of people asked me the question about our future and how can you leave someone you’ve spent 3 years seriously dating in a long term relationship…
I loved him enough to let him go…and I think one thing I have learned the most from this break up is that it is a lot harder to be mature and do the right thing then to be immature and kick and scream the whole way…I would never say that x and I ever gave up on each other..or our relationship..and if any of you reading this think that a long distance relationships never work…that’s a lie..they do but it takes A LOT of work…more than words can describe…but it is a test of if you truly love someone..and I also have a new found respect for long distance relationships… because the majority of X and I’s relationship was spent though the phone…or on the computer…. It was extremely hard but I think personally it worked for us because we both of so goal driven and focused on school that it helped balance things.
Either way..letting go was the hardest thing but I had to understand that God has something better for both of us…so I was the selfish and selfless one all wrapped in one person to call it quits..and walking away was the hardest thing I had to do in life it felt like…so for those who are contemplating walking away from a long term relationship..my advice is 1) if you have to ask/ or are questioning it..its probably that time…and 2) PRAY PRAY PRAY…God has a funny way of dealing with things 3) Be an adult… maturity is always the high road…lastly…THERE IS NOTHING GOD CANNOT HANDEL! He is what gets me through at the end of the day…because walking away from the one you love the most…is…..harder than words can describe...
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